Disclaimer : LONG BUT WORTH THE READ
So, the title of this article is a question about your relationship status. Now, I am not talking about a relationship with a Man/Woman rather, I am referring to your “Relationship with the Most High God”. This relationship is so crucial and paramount in the life of every WWIW/HHIW because without it, the relationship we have with our spouse, will run out of fuel. With regards to the -in-waitings, many are too eager to be in a relationship, forgetting that the most important relationship is the one with the Holy Spirit and until you have a relationship with the Holy Spirit, I don’t advice any lady to start dreaming of a “Tall, Handsome, Loaded & Holy-Ghost-Filled Brother”. In fact, a man should be the one eager to be in a relationship with you and have you as his Help-Meet. It is also important for us WWIW to know our worth as often times, God allows His beloved daughters to remain single, and set aside in a “rib” because He loves us so much and wants us a relationship with us first, before presenting us to our “Adam”. SELAH!… Also, as a Woman, God needs to get to a level of Trust with you, so much that He can vouch that when that “Brother” comes, you won’t dump Him (God), or as they say in NIGERIA “Fashy” Him. Remember GOD is a Jealous God, His name is even Jealous (Exodus 34:14).
Notwithstanding, many Wives-in-Waiting, want to get married, wear Aso-Ebi, a Wedding Dress, have Children, and all that comes with a Wedding but forget to understand that a Wedding is held for a few hours/ days but a Marriage is a life time. Also a Marriage is a 3 fold-chord that comprises of “God, the Husband and the Wife” but many want to shut God out and say “My Husband and I”…This shouldn’t be the case. Now, I am not saying, that only those that have a relationship with God are married, NO!. All I am simply saying is, for some WIW, our purpose and relationship with God needs to be solid before embarking on a marital journey, so that we don’t begin to see our Husbands as our Messiah who has saved us from “Single-Town”. My Darling Sisters, you will surely leave “Single-Town” but if you must leave, please leave intact, you can even leave everything behind but please take God along with you to “Married-Town”, because you will need Him there, more than ever.
On the other hand, some WIW, also need to understand that God might just be keeping you in “Single-Town” because He wants to make you enjoy somethings, learn some things, enjoy your single days; go on holidays, start your masters/ PhD, find your purpose and many more…but because you have compared yourself with “Tola, Bola and Shola”, you think their Marriage is perfect, then, you do all it takes to join them in “Married-Town”. Please sisters, all that glitters is not gold, some married people wish they were single again, so take your time, and understand that everyone’s timing is different, so let us learn to wait on God’s timing. God may just be working on your future Husband, In-Laws and possibly protecting you from certain mishaps.
Thus, I urge us all to solidify our relationship with God, walk with Him as He takes you to your “prepared table” be it as a WWIW or HHIW, if you don’t walk with Him, or have a relationship with Him, no “Google-Maps” can take you to your “prepared table”. Therefore, let us stick close to God and follow His leading, especially the “-in-Waitings”; so that we don’t miss it in Marriage. I am laying more emphasis on the “-in-waitings” because I have heard a lot of things from some married people and the long and short of their advice is -“Don’t Rush”, “Trust God’s Timing”, “Marriage is an eye-opener”, “Always Pray to God for direction”, and many more. To add to the list, I say:- “Marriage is a beautiful institution created by God, so keep Him paramount in your Marriage”, “Crave a Relationship with GOD more than anything or anyone in this world” and Let God be your “Sat-Nav / Google Maps”.
Once you and your spouse have a relationship with God, it will be very easy for your to communicate, because Marriage is like a Triangle, with GOD at the top and you and your spouse at the base.
Overall, a relationship with God, Before & In Marriage is key, because God is the author of marriage and whenever you face challenges in your marriage, you can call on Him directly. As an -in-waiting, whenever you are unsure about a situation, you don’t have to start going to a Prophet to check if “The brother/sister is the one or not”, you can always pray to God yourself. As a married man/woman, when issues arise, you don’t have to ask a “Prophet” to help you pray for your Husband or Wife to love / stay faithful to you, you can always ask the Holy Spirit to help you.
I could go on and on about this but this is where I drop “my pen”. As an -in-waiting, having a relationship with God will save you a lot of heart aches and pain, it will make you complete and whole and when that “Brother or Sister” comes, you will know. You won’t be under any pressure because “Weddings are Trending”, you know your time will come, neither will you worry because your heart / mind is constantly set on God and you also Trust His timing. You have a Relationship with Him (You Pray to Him, Study His Word, abide in Him and He also abides in you). You also know that because you are planted in God, your leaves will not wither and you will produce your fruits in your season like the Blessed Man / Tree illustration in Psalm 1.
God bless you.
Feeyi Okupe ❤