Hello beautiful people. Story time! There’s a girl I know who’s never been on a date on valentines day, never received any gifts or chocolates in all the years she’s been aware of valentines day. In fact, the one time she gave a gift on valentines day to her supposedly boyfriend and she didn’t get anything in return. That girl is/was me, ”was” because hopefully 2018 is different lol. Did being make me feel like I wasn’t good enough? Yes, for a while. Did I get jealous when I saw cute couples and I wished I was in their shoes, yes sometimes. But thankfully, I’ve come to understand the truth . My worth does not lie in any of these things. A relationship status should not define your worth, or who you are.
Sadly a lot of people look to a relationship to make them happy or fulfilled but no relationship can bring complete fulfilment or lasting joy. I noticed that whenever I’m not on good terms with Abah, no other relationship in my life seems to make sense. I get easily irritated by little things, I lose my patience fast, I’m unhappy, I’m angry and I don’t even know why, scratch that, I know why, I’m not talking to God. Really it is too much stress not to be on good terms with God, I cant survive without Him, I’ll just be a hot mess.
So what if you find yourself single on valentines day? Nothing is wrong with you. If you desire to be in a relationship, instead of obsessing about the fact that you’re single, sit down and ask yourself why you’re single, find out if a relationship is what you need right now, find out if God even wants you in a relationship, and pray about your desires. Coming from a girl who’s been in too many ‘situationships’, I honestly thought I was cursed or something, I spoke to my pastor about it, his response totally changed the way I had been seeing things. He asked me why I wasn’t seeing it from the angle that God was protecting me from the wrong relationships. What exactly was the point of going in and out of relationships. Hurting yourself, wasting your time, emotion money and energy? My eyes opened to the fact that maybe I wanted a relationship not for the right reasons. Yes he’s fine, she’s gorgeous, (s)he speaks well, (s)he makes your heart skip a million beats in one second but does (s)he love God? Are they actively pursuing a relationship with God? Do they have sense lol ? Do they respect people? etc. I started evaluating the guys around me and I realised why God was saying a big fat NO.
You’re not single because you think you’re ugly, you’re not single because you’re not good enough, you’re single because you want to be or God wants you to be at the moment. Heather Lindsey always talks about how God hides you sometimes, there’s a video on her you tube channel where she talks about singleness and she talked about it there. So don’t beat your self up for being single. Single is not a curse and it certainly doesn’t mean you’re alone. Look for ways to make yourself happy, take yourself out, spoil yourself. When last did you do just you? If you’re not a fan having fun alone, get other single girls around you, and make valentines day memorable. You can draw inspiration from my last post where I talked about about valentines day ideas.
There’s so much love to give, valentines day is for everybody because everybody deserves to be loved. I realised in loving others, you find love, in being kind, you receive kindness, in giving others, you find happiness. This brings me to the most important point, there’s nothing as beautiful as experiencing the love of the father. It puts me in tears every time I think about it. It’s the kind of love that made a man give His life for me, I mean, it’s a love that I can never comprehend, crazy sweet love. Hillsong’s ‘Here now‘ calls it madness (one of my favourite songs right now).
There’s no way I’m letting go of that kind of love. You can also experience that kind of love too. Don’t say I’m too far gone, His love is wide enough to contain your sins, if you’re not on talking terms with God, he’s waiting for you to say something. Make things right with Father, He loves you very much and this can never be a cliche. I hope you found this post really helpful, if you did, please kindly leave a comment below, and share with others who might need to read this post.
Happy valentine in advance!
Love, Fisayo ❤
Jacket – Missguided
Jeans – Thrifted
Shoes- Can’t remember
Braided wig- @themalliastore